Destination

This is probably one of my favorite drawings. It actually speaks pretty loudly. My past was filled with a lot of abuse, neglect, and trauma. I used to let how I was raised control my adulthood. I was unaware that as an adult, I finally could have control of my life. I was introduced to that fact one day while I was in an ambulance on the way to the ER due to self harm. The paramedic riding in the back with me knew I was struggling deep inside. He told me that as a child, I didn't have control over the abuse and what was happening to me. He totally changed my life that day when he said I am an adult now and how I live now is my responsibility. It was then that I realized that I took over my abusers actions and was abusing myself by choice. I had to work hard at not continue living as a victim but rather as a survivor. I was so motivated and determined which is where this drawing stems from. As adults, we do have choices to make about our lives. We can stay trapped with our past circumstances and situations where we tip toe in our lives waiting for the bomb (us) to explode. The two parts with the rainbows represents things that keep us in bondage so we can't live a life of freedom. There are more things of course but the six things I have highlighted in my drawing is:

Denial

Substance abuse

Perfection

Self-harm

Avoidance

Anger

Then I have drawn a tree. You might think the tree seems out of place in this picture but it is not. The tree represents our growth. It also is a visual for the truth written in John 15:5. It says, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in Me and I in you, you will bear much fruit. Apart from Me you can do nothing".

Please read that scripture again and try to grasp what we are being told. We are to grow in Christ. In the drawing, Christ is the vine. And we are the branches. Branches does not grow out without being connected without a vine, right? I have also realized that we are not expected to change on our own doing. As God says, we can do nothing without Him. I find that so comforting. The fact that I am now responsible for my destination, yet not alone, helps so much! We are branches and what we should be seeking in order to grow, heal, and flourish is the Vine! To God be the glory!